What 6 Self Care Tips Can We Learn from The Beatles?
Going back for the third time
I’ve been watching the amazing Get Back for the third time, and it always baffles me how The Beatles managed to keep their sanity.
Despite the fact that by 1969 they were on the brink of splitting up, when you watch their work, friendships and behaviours in this Michael Lindsay-Hogg/ Peter Jackson documentary film, what you see are four blokes who are still in the eye of the Beatle hurricane, observing their crazy world around them, trying to get on with their lives.
I completely missed Mental Health Day, which was on 10th October, but because every day should be Mental Health Day, here’s a blog about self care, à la Beatles.
How did The Beatles do their own self care?
They weren’t afraid to walk away
In our society, there is a lot of emphasis on sticking things out, not being a quitter and seeing something through to the end. Of course, if things are going well or you’re doing something that is fulfilling and healthy for you, then yes of course you should see it through to the end.
But for The Beatles, by the time of their final tour in 1966, they were jaded. They were burnt out and sick of people both loving and hating them in poisonous amounts, so they walked away from touring, knowing that if they didn’t, they may not survive as a band or as individuals for much longer. They did what they had to do for their own good.
2. They ignored negative feedback
It was no coincidence that The Fabs stopped touring at the same time as religious madpeople were burning the very records that they had previously idol-worshipped. John Lennon’s observational commentary about how he saw young people of today moving their focus from religion to pop music annoyed the young people who had moved their focus from religion to pop music, and the fans mutinied.
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Not only did The Beatles have to make a big decision to stop touring, but they also had to coat themselves in an impermeable membrane to stop the words of radical hypocrites from getting to them from now on. Not an easy thing to do, but they did it. Luckily, there were still a whole lot of people who loved them for who they were, so they wisely directed their art at those people instead.
3. They were open to new ideas
Another ‘contrary to popular opinion’ point I’d like to make is that emotional maturity involves being open to new thoughts and ideas, and being open to influence. There can be a mindset that if you’re open to influence that you’re weak. MindOwl.org explain how that’s not true: “A key part of growing in emotional maturity is being open to learning. An emotionally mature person recognises that they do not know everything and that there is (always) so much more to learn and gain from others around them.”
One amazing thing about The Beatles is that they wanted to learn all the time. They worked with different artists, studied them, and changed their styles constantly to explore these other worlds. Of course, some of these teachers didn’t end up being all that, such as The Maharishi Yogi, but when the spark faded between him and The Beatles, The Fabs simply used their art of walking away.
4. They stuck to their convictions
Once the mop-top wigs had been put back in the dressing-up box and the jelly babies went back to being eaten after having been thrown onstage for so long, The Beatles became more than a little vulnerable to criticism. They dared to do what they wished, musically, artistically and personally. From around ‘66 onwards there were dismayed cries from the press and public like, “go back to your ex-wife” or “why don’t you write She Loves You again?” or “why would you send back your MBE based on your personal beliefs?” or “how come you’re taking drugs in 1967 London, of all places?” and on and on.
The Beatles heard all these cries of frustration, and probably took some of it onboard, but mainly had a chuckle and went back to what they were doing. If they listened to each and every criticism, they’d likely not have become a band in the first place. They knew themselves and each other well enough to keep going, to stick to their convictions. It might take a little while, but the world usually catches on in the end.
5. They shut their bedroom door and got on with creating
One of my favourite feelings, when I hear a new band or read a great book or watch a new TV programme, is one where I get the distinct impression that whoever has created this new work has spent a lot of time on their own, in their creative ‘bedroom’ and have emerged holding this new piece of work that has come entirely from their own brains.
During the course of the film Get Back, we go from The Beatles trying to be a film and a band at the same time, to holing themselves up in a cosy place with people they know and love, writing an album that comes from them and them alone. They got back to basics and used the great skill of mindfulness to look down at their work and not at anything else around them. The film is the result of this process and not the other way around.
6. They surrounded themselves with the right people
If there is one thing The Beatles did very, very well – besides the obvious stuff – it was to surround themselves with people who fed their creativity and nurtured their talents. From their producer, George Martin to guest musicians, Eric Clapton and Billy Preston, they ‘used’ (for want of a better word) the positive energy, generosity of spirits and sheer ceaseless talent of those around them. And it wasn’t a one-way street, either. People genuinely cared for and loved the Beatles, and wanted them to succeed.
So, what is self care?
In the end, it’s about:
Knowing yourself
Being close to your own feelings
Not people pleasing for the sake of it
Walking away from toxic stuff
Keeping the good people around you
Sticking to your convictions
Staying open to learning
And if today’s efforts don’t go according to plan, hey, there’s always tomorrow.
How to hire a freelance website copywriter who also practices self care…
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